|
All
I ever wanted was to be a member of the young generation. Obscenely tight
trousers, cap-sleeved T-shirt and floppy hair. Dancing for the nation on a Saturday night, live from exotic locations like Weston-Super-Mare. Shudder
at the thought. All I ended up with was being mistaken for a little girl "
Och hasn't she got lovely hair, och wit a bonnie wee lassie". Not good when
you know you're also a bonnie wee poof. Homo was definitely in my genes and
I was in everyone else's [male,girls were pals] before I could even spell
sexuality. It's amazing who's available when you yourself are so unknowingly
available. But then most men never look at the mantle-piece when they're
stoking the fire. They would dump, then I'd get thumped. Hated school - made
my life hell. Was a time when any old sadist could become a teacher.
Aparrently, my neice says, I'm the only famous pupil not listed in their
books but then protestants are not exactly renowned for their tollerence.
Bunked. No grades. End up selling paint and wallpaper paid for the perms and
Saturday nights in satellite city (it's a wonder I'm not crippled, dancing
all night in cowboy boots). Fell in with a bad crowd - called themselves
friends. With friends like them............I was a very trusting and
gullible young thing but a nasty streak lurked within. Things were getting
out of hand. It wasnt what I wanted. I used to read and dream about London.
Anywhere else but home really. Got here in the summer of '79. Only meant to
be for the weekend. First stop, Earls Court. Oh my! so many men, a return
ticket, two days and so little time [It was a good few years before
Hi-Energy]. Home - I'd found it! bought the T-shirt and stayed. Hurt so many
people in the process. It hurt me, but I was angry. I was looking after
number one. This was my chance to start afresh, find out who I was, I could
make up any old shite and who'd know what I was, wanted and needed.
Of course, wasn't so romantically simple. Contrary to myth, the streets are
not paved with gold. No money, no address and no shame. Fearless puts it
mildly. That ginge minge got me by as did my baby face. Hey - gotta do what
you gotta do.
Finally got off the 'dilly [as in Picca'] courtesy of the kindness of a
stranger. Gave us a room at his house. No strings. There is good out there
you know. We were lucky. Good found us. So, here was I in a London address.
NW5, Hampstead no less. Got a job. Heals - kitchen accessories, Debenhams -
D.I.Y. - I know, wine bars. Apprentice baker.
Don't know what possessed me there. Dancing 'til 3 then at my ovens at 5.
Not a good combination. I had baked one loaf too many. Then it was a loooong
period in the national handbag - benefits. Don't regret a single scrounging second. Gave me the
time to grow, discover and subvert! It's now the summer of '83.
Squatting at Coptic Street by the British Museum. I can still smell the
honeysuckle that grew in the courtyard. It was one of the original
alternative scene babies. I lived with and was influenced by some truly
wonderful people. Left wing would be an understatement. And of course I
had all the makings of a little militant. The Labour party young
socialists. The Anti-Nazi League. I wore my heart - or should I say
numerous badges on my sleeve. I was never one to keep my tounge in my
pocket, I was out - like truly out there. An angry young gay man.I
wanted to right the world. I really believed, and still believe it can
be done. Friendships were forged and many of them are still going strong.
 It's
now the summer of '83. Met Larry and Steve through Jill. Jill was one of
the people I was working with on a community video - funded by the G.L.C
"Red Ken funds one-eyed black single lesbian mother creche shock" as the
tabloids would have us believe. It was called "Framed Youth" [revenge of
the teenage perverts]' I had sung [although at that time I didn't really
think of myself as being an experienced vocalist, as it was the first
time I had ever really sung (I look at it more as my first singing
lesson). A song, accompanied only with a drum machine, called "Screaming".
They heard, they liked. The monster was born - you can blame Richard
Coles for that! - Told me they had some synthesisers, I had an obsessive
fascination of synthesised sound, and would I like to come over and mess
around. How exciting I thought. It was. I was suddenly part of something
I had only ever heard on record before.
The world of "Me Giorgio - Utopia" [as in Morrodor] was at my
fingertips...Bronski Beat were born. One album. "The Age Of Consent" a
soundtrack for isolated homos everywhere. 'Smalltown Boy', 'Why?', 'Need
A Man Blues', not lyrical landmarks but the honesty and straightforward
sentiment meant something to so many people. It was exciting and fun.
Here i was one minute on the dole, the next at number three in the
charts and on top of the pops, an institution, a religious experience on
a thursday night at 7 o'clock and I had only done it for a laugh! Then
it all went squiffy. A lack of understanding of each other's needs and
the realisation, well for me anyway, that to work.
So intimately our friendships had to be strong plus there was to much
intimate history between the others.The chance to support Madonna on the
'Like A Virgin' tour and me saying no and truly pissing everyone off
prompted my decision to call it a day. I was not a popular man. Still,
needs must I had already met Richard Coles a few years previous as we
had worked together on 'Framed Youth'. It was Richard who had encouraged
me to sing. I was very close to Richard at this point. He made me laugh
so much. And who else would hang out with a man with a pink triangle
dyed into the middle of his hair! He also saved me from a trampling courtesy of maggies
boot boys while demonstrating against pit closures at warrington during
the miners strike. Amongst other adventures, the Communards were born.
The name was taken from the Paris commune during the Franco/Prussian
war. Such were our idealistic beliefs. Control and self-determination
should be a right not a privilege. We believed in human rights and still
do. The Communards at the time had a very unique live set up. Three
poofs and seven hetero women. I can honestly say it was the best laugh
in a live situation I've ever had. Three years, two albums and constant
touring built up a loyal following. Our success was low key until the
release of 'Don't Leave Me This Way'. We had arrived. The song for me
from this period has to be 'For A Friend' this was written in response
to one of our friends dying from an A.I.D.S. related illness. Mark was
also the first person close to us to die.
Richard and I were determined to bring the awareness of A.I.D.S issues
into the pop arena. No one else was doing it. We were shocked and angry.
So as well as music had an political agenda. I'd say we done quite well
for two unlikely pop stars . Like all good things leave it on a high. So
we called it a day.
Now it's '89. And I'm on the move again. This time it's solo."Read My
Lips" was created' during a period of intense political involvement and
if I think back it was also a period of bereavement. By this time I had
known too many people who were sick or who had died. I was still angry.
'Act Up' was born out of frustration and the terrible complacency that I
felt surrounded H.I.V. and A.I.D.S. Myself with a group of others
decided it was time to do something to challenge this. Direct action and
civil disobedience seemed the only way to go. We felt too many people
were being denied basic rights. There was still so much discrimination
and hysteria. Disinformation was rife. People were dealing with shit. We
achieved a lot during Its short life. Action = Life / Silence = Death. 'Read
My Lips' the title track is the song that sums this period up. It was
also a blast to get up so many people's noses. A short stay in San
Francisco [was made an honorary lesbian only because I couldn't seem to
hit it off with the men out there.
Picture this - me, rolling drunk in a club, the place is packed and then
I hear in that whiny west coast queenie drawl "scuse me but you really
are invading my personal space" yeah me and 2,000 other homos ya freak.
It was all too much for me but them dykes, what a blast] Returned after
6 months to release ?
The Singles Collection' with a sleeve to melt any grannie's heart. Loved
those airbrushed cheekbones. ' To Love Somebody' tried to drag me into
that "mature artist' camp - Yeuck! Huge hit though.
By this time London Records were really getting on my
tits. If I was to hear "can't do that, too gay" one more time. I mean,
most of the northern hemisphere knew I was a poof for goodness sake! So
it was one more album with London "Dare To Love" a collection of great
songs that could have been treated a lot better, along with the artist.
Anyway enough moaning. This was more a reflective period and my voice
was also stronger. I felt more of a singer than I had ever done. The
title track was me on my way to dealing with all them ghosties I had
been keeping locked away. Half me, half someone else, It asks "Where is
the crime in love?" Where indeed. Leave London December '96 Free - wahoo!
Signed to Gut records in May of '97 I've spent the last two years
writing, drinking, writing, messin' around, producing, the odd near
successful relationship here and there [too greedy me, I don't want the
cake , I want the cake shop!], more writing, producing,drinking 'avin' a
laugh with my friend Sally Herbert with whom I also live and drive to
distraction.
'Manage The Damage' title of our efforts, was all done at home. What a
luxury. There is no better place to create than in the environment that
gives a feeling of security. No paying ridiculous money for over priced
studios. No oppressive vocal booths. Although it's the poor neighbours I
felt for, suffering my wailing day in, day out. The only drawback is
that it's so easy to say "Och we'll finish it tomorrow hen". But we've
had freedom to do our own thing. And also the support of those who
believe in us. Been a long time coming. The album is a rather eclectic
selection of songs. "Here I am" - The opening track - A song of death,
God, an atheist, me and what if. Hmmmm....make of it what you will. So
many of the songs I'm still interpreting for myself. But then there is "Girl
Falling Down" written after reading in the paper the story, an everyday
tragedy, of a girl who's been robbed of any chance to have a life.
People, society, the system had let her down. Abuse, violence, fear
it's all she'd ever known and still no-one saw, heard, it's like she was
invisible. Sadly her story is not unique. "Lay Down" a song to the glory
of oral...!!!! "Dark Sky" words of rejection - OK, I was dumped. "My
Life" I think that one's about messy Jessy, my alter ego [you don't
wanna know about messy but can be seen around the west end in various
states of distress quite frequently]. In all it's a collection of songs
about life + love, Isn't that what it's all about?
So this is my self - penned press release. Goes on a bit I know but I
have cut loads out. All the kiss and tell juicy bits, sorry. Whatever
became of the 'Young Generation'?
P.S. Confronted those demons - Glasgow smiles better.
JS
|
Back 
Home